Each of us has our own personal boundaries and those of us that are socially responsible also recognize the boundaries of the company we keep. Not only did I cross one but blasted right through the other. I knew when I was saying it I had crossed a line but I figured the shock value was worth the price for a good joke. I hope I never make that mistake again.

In the company of a young friend of my son’s, I “fag” in an offhand derogatory fashion. I knew her older brother is gay (hell, I’m likely catering his wedding). I simply wanted the jaw dropping response to my punch line. Not only was it in poor taste, I was the responsible adult around a table full of seventeen year old kids.

The table full of “kids” acted like mature adults and casually moved the conversation along. I should have apologized immediately. I should have made it clear that, at least in my opinion, that word should be in the same boat with the “N” word, retard and the cavalier use of “rape”, slowly sinking at sea.

I don’t think the girl took offense. She’s been back since and we’ve spoken as usual but I owe her a private apology. I also need to make a public apology to people I love and respect. To my good friend who had a sex change operation. To the memories of Joe and Bret who, as a couple, contracted and died of HIV/Aids. They deserve better from a friend.